Friday, January 18, 2013

As deep as well.

Happy 2013 everyone!

I just finished my dissertation period. All done and dusted. Hopefully.... Allah will grant me a really good mark. Amin. So here i am, having free time, so typing my life away~

It's snowing again. Macbook weather forecast says it's going to snow everyday, from today (Thurs) till Tuesday next week. Apart from Sunday. I love it when snow falls. That moment.. serene moment when snow falls. And im looking from my window. Snowflakes falling makes me wish that all my problems can just fall away. The burden. The worries. Fall like the snowflakes.

I wish things can be calmer. Just like the snow that settled. When no one has stepped on it yet. I wish life wont go by this fast. It's so fast i feel like im driving a formula 1 car. It's already 2013. And so many things has happened. And yet there are so many other things that i have not done.

I dont wanna have regrets. I wanna do a lot of things, experience a lot of thing. YOLO moments they say, but plis ah, YOLO moments that are still within my moral conduct. I dont wanna be the one saying of the what ifs of life when im older. I know we have to work hard too, but i dont wnna be the one "ahh all i did in uni was work. i didnt taste the good of life" I dont wanna be old and only then do all the things that i shouldve done when i was young. Because then, i won't have the energy to do so. Might have the money and time, but energy.... no.

Thats what they say. When you are young, you have time and energy but no money. Adults you have energy and money but no time. And when youre old... all you have is time and money. but no energy.

I guess we can never be satisfied with everything. We will keep on wishing and wishing for the things that we don't have. Then again, if we do have all our wishes granted, doesn't that mean we wont have anymore purpose then?

And sometimes there are moments that we want to give up and don't want it anymore because it's just too difficult. But when i've come back to my senses... i'll say and console myself... These are the things i want. and the things i have now are the things that i used to wish for.

I know it's good to think thoroughly of the things happening in ur life. But... Sometimes... all these thoughts in my head are too toxic. So please... if you see me in my deep dark well, take my hand and pull me up. Save. Me.

x
Ping.

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

When life turns slightly sour.

Salam.

So today, someone close to me shared her disappointment. The fact that she didnt get into any available uni to pursue the next step of her education broke her heart. It felt good to lift up her spirits through talking to her. And i was sad, she was one of the person I jam with, staying up all night, talking about useless hilarious stuff, bejalan, cakap pasal fesyen. I was soooo looking forward to inviting her to my housewarming, in fact, i have already invited her gazillion times, telling her my room is always open for her. Sedih eh. sigh.

Anyway, that's not the point i'm trying to make.

The point is, I was reading through tumblr and saw her post. How she was feeling. She didn't say what happened to her. But she explained what she was feeling, the frustration and discontentment that she was experiencing while all these happened.

Reading all that, it made me realise something, typing something that comes from your heart really makes a difference. I really do find typing all these acts like a healing potion. Like, whenever you're sad, typing all these away with mellow music as background helps a lot.

Both of us are different. But somehow we clicked. She filled in what I lack, and vice versa. Always giving a piece of advice (or pieces) that are really helpful. That we should pursue our ambition berabis rabis, she's one of the hardworking ones, yang never make excuses, always striving to be the best, and never giving up.

I need such will, strength. And determination. To carry on.

Please ya rabb, grant her happiness, blessing and success, and to everyone i love as well. Amin amin amin.

x

Friday, August 31, 2012

Peterpan syndromme.

Salam.

Tomorrow marks the first of September. Which means, i have 19 more days here in Brunei. Part of me is excited to start decorating my new house in Nottingham, meeting new people, and embarking on the third year journey.

Another part of me is scared. Third year means shit just got a little bit too real now. It's going to be my dissertation year. I will not have any holidays in December, and apparently my family plus cuzzies etc etc are planning to go to Dubai. Guhhreat. Just great. And in summer, i will only have two weeks worth of holidays. Really med school, really? I just kept thinking, should i even go back for that short period of time.

I honestly do not know.

Last night i was feeling weird. Like, as if i have lost something. I kept searching for that something, and obviously to no avail, because i do not know what i was searching for. I thought maybe i was craving for something, but i really did not feel like eating, at all.

Anyways, last week, i was at my cousin's open house, and epicly, my cousin kana risik. Which means she's going to be engaged soon. It felt really weird. Considering she's one of my cousin yang dangan bemain masa damit. And now that she had got a proper job and soon to be engaged, is just weird. Because it means she's all grown up.

Which means i'm all grown up.

Sometimes i feel like Peterpan. I never want to grow up.

But growing up is inevitable, so i should welcome it, with open arms. I guess........

"We all want to grow up. We're desperate to get there. Grab all the opportunities we can to live. We're so busy trying to get out of that mess, we don't think about the fact that it's going to be cold out there. Really freaking cold. Because growing up sometimes means leaving people behind. And by the time we stand on our own two feet, we're standing there alone" - Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

A hint of vanilla.

Salam Ramadhan the 11th :)

Today, I was showing my dad the souvenirs i bought from Turkey. While helping my mom put them in the display almari, i opened the bottom drawer, and there I found my old book, "Thanks for the memory". I don't remember if I've ever gotten to finish it. I think I did. It's basically about a guy who was afraid to donate blood cos he was sooo afraid of needle, and then, one day, his blood saved a person, and from there the story went.

I've always wanted to donate blood. But last time I remembered, I was too young to do so. And now that i am old enough, I can't because I just found out that i'm anemic. So untuk org yang masih mampu untuk menderma darah, i urge you to donate blood, not only because it will help someone, at the same time, you can get your blood checked for any abnormalities as well! So DOUBLE WIN! :D

Back to the old book i found. I saw it, and it brought back nostalgic memories. Sama macam the title. Terima kasih di atas memori ini. Ironic. Like iron man ironing. I kept trying to find what memory was in store for me while i was reading it back then. But i could not find any. Must have been something insignificant, or maybe something too significant and hurt too much that I forced myself to not remember it. At all.

Ho wells. Who cares about the past.... kan....? They say move on.. but where do i go? Eyah lagu Katy Perry. Oh well, since i can't even remember it, im sure it's something insignificant.

Moving on....

Old books, i love your smell. I was googling what makes old books smells sooooooo soo good! (in my opinion lah they smell good!) Rupanya, it's because, old books release volatile stuff used in the production of the books, and ada a little hint of vanilla thats why it smells nice.

VIDEO HERE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUaInTfrDnA&feature=player_embedded

Hmm.. somehow this post does not say what i really want to say. I guess sometimes whatever you structured in your head can't be penned down/typed down. Creatively. Or maybe aku kali saja yang kurang kreatif. Kesedihan yang teramat kalau itu macam.

And i stumbled across this article from Thought catalog and i quote:

"Change is gradual. Change doesn’t happen with a new pair of jeans or moving to a different city. It comes from within. Our generation has no real markers for where we should be. We get there when we get there. The answers are less obvious and clear. All you can really hope for is that you survive with your self-respect intact. In the meantime, just enjoy the ride.

And if you feel nauseous at any time, feel free to throw up."

I guess it is really okay to be paning and muntah if things go wrong. Hahaha.



Lots and lots of love,
Piping! Mwahhhhs!

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Mortality.

Assalamualaikum.

I have safely landed in Brunei tuesday of this week, alhamdulillah. Enjoying Ramadhan mubarak, amazing food, and the company of family and soon, friends.

While I was on the plane on the way back to Brunei, as always, there was again, a turbulence. Usually I was afraid. But this time, i was extra afraid. I kept thinking about the recent helicopter crash in Labi. How a number of soldiers passed away in the holy month of Ramadhan. I kept thinking, will this plane crash too? Will i die too? And if I die, am I ready?

The words death kept popping into the head. The plane shook. Up, down, it went.

But alhamdulillah, everything was okay and after all that happened, alhamdulillah alhamdulillah alhamdulillah, it all stopped.

Actually, this post was an inspiration of several post i read earlier. They were actually just some random articles, plus obligatory posts that i usually read, summed up together.

Somehow, today, they were mostly about death.

I went to visit my grandparents' kubur today. I kept thinking, "Mudah2an yaasin yang kami baca ani menulung drg di kubur amin" And then another thought entered my mind. So we read yassin to them, but if we also pass away, who's going to read it to them? So who is going to help them reduce their sufferings or light their grave? And then i thought lucky are those who give charity/sedekah and then people still use the things that they sedekah. Like building a mosque or something. Mcm light will be in their graves. And yet sometimes we hesitate to give charity. While that will actually help us in our grave. Why the hesitation, i really do ask myself sometimes. :(

I was reading this post by proudduck, and how her grandma has just passed away recently. Reading all her emotions typed up in that post teared me up. Then followed up by reading Brunei times article dedicated to the helicopter crash victims. About our mortality. About how death will come for us. The question is, kitani ready kah. Sigh.

May Allah bless all muslim souls, amin. And may we all die di dalam iman, amin ya rabb. And semoga tangan ini akan lebih mudah memberi sedekah. Amin. And semoga Allah menguatkan iman kita yang masih lemah ini. Amin.


Piping.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Heartstring ku.

Salam.

Now that all my written exams are over, well since yesterday pulang sudah tu, it's time for korean dramas!! Currently watching Heartstring by Yong Hwa and Park Shin Hye. And i regret saying aku inda suka si Yong hwa awal-awal.. ahhhh... what korean dramas do to you. they change your perception of someone so easily. And now mcm.... I am so so sooooo in like (hahha awu not love lol) with him. He's so nice, walaupun ia jahat awal-awal that I always feel like slapping him, and the fact ia mcm suka someone wayyyyy older than him. Hmmm, buta wah ya inda nampak the pretty girl that's always bringing him cappucino every single day. BLIND I TELL YOU.

Btw, i like mocha frappucino with whipped cream on top plis, thanks. (HINT NI BTW HAHAHHAHAHAH to any guy ahhh so sad. sad sad laif HAHAHHAHAHHA)

Anyway. And then... at one moment, i was thinking. In the drama how like he's a bad boy but turned into a decent loving guy. But then in real life, does this happen too kah? I've never really heard stories, real stories, from someone i am close with. Macam, so if a bad guy turned good in real life, do they sometimes revert back to their old self? Yang jahat apa? Pasal I saw this one tweet from a singer, that a girl's wish of changing a bad boy into a good one, is merely.... just a wish.

Really?

Entah. I don't know pulang. I guess it depends on individual punya perception.

And then there's this one song, called "I will forget you" by park shin hye in the drama. i was feeling mellow the other day, sekali i made a cover and sent it to my korean friend for prooflisten (HAHAH does this word even exist lol)


I will forget you. Starting today,
I don’t know you. I have never seen you.
We never even walked pass eachother.
I’m okay. I forgot everything. I’m happy with my busy life.
I’ve met a great person too.

Love is always like this. It fades away after some time.
Can’t even remember it, Oh.

# When love goes away, another love comes again. It definitely will.
Even if it hurts now, it will hear a little later.
It will forget. I will too.

It’s not difficult. I will forget everything after today.
I’m just getting used to my changed life. Oh~ No.

Love is always like this. It fades away after some time.
Can’t even remember it. Yes~

# REPEAT

I will erase everything.
I definitely will.

When love goes away, another love comes again. It definitely will.
Even if tears fall now, I will smile a little later.
I will (now) forget you (now). Just like a wound heals…
I will. I will. I will forget you.


Things I wanna pinpoint from that song:

1) Busy life makes you forget someone you love. But then.. when that busy life subsides, when you're all alone in the room and lying down on your bed, isn't the first thing that pops to your mind.... the person? But then i guess kalau ngalih mcm tarus tidur jua kali ah.

2) So they say when one love goes away, another comes. I guess love comes in all form. From family, friends, and Allah especially. But this love, from this one special person, will it be the same. Will it be better. or worse. And mcm, when you're listening to certain songs that you used to listen to, doesnt it remind you of all the memories? And then, do you hear you heart break?

3) That love fades away with time. But you see old couple yang suwit berabis yang mcm madly in love, like your grandparents, your parents, etc, and it makes you think, at times it fades away, but other times, it stays, and it stays strong.

Sorry sebenarnya very useless post ani. Pasal si yonghwa ni! HAHAHHAHA nah menyalahkan artis jua lah.. sendiri punya psl.

Anyway so long. Love you guys. Walaupun aku ind atau siapa sebenarnya yang masih baca posts di sini ani. maybe no one, maybe just random people, but then again, it's okay. Kenchana. Eseh. koreanised. HEHEHHEHEHHEHE.

Doakan kejayaan saya dalam practical OSCE! May Allah make it easy for me. Amin amin amin

xxxxxxx
Pips

Thursday, February 16, 2012

A little peek into my day today.

Salam eberyone. :)

If you don't wanna hear me rambling, jangan tah baca. Kalau you're super bored, or you really like me (HA-HA) then read on :)

I know i haven't posted anything for quite some time... But suddenly ada urge to post something about what happened today.

Basically, i had a free day today BLESS :D Sekali went to the city with my little brother. Was getting ready and suddenly, there was a loud knock! Tekajut berabis lah, and turned out it was a super beautiful bouquet of flowers, it was the most amazing flower bouquet i have ever received, and it made me so happy, alhamdulillah! The perfect colour, amount, and i dont wanna say the name but if you're reading this, a super big thank you to you :)))

Went to the city and ate at Munch Munch.. I don't know why but somehow the burger sana nyaman berabis. And i don't like mayo, tapi mcm.... it was so good. Maybe it was just one of my cravings, endless i tell you! Kesian future laki ku kalau ku mengidam. Makan pelanduk kali. Jangantah macam-macam okay cravings? Tenks.

Heniways, went back rushing pasal I had two house viewing to attend to.

First house viewing:

a HUGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE house! with two toilets. everything was huge, from bedroom, to living room, kitchen, and even the toilets! Slightly old house, but thiking abt family coming over, it would be good to accommodate a lot of people ie family coming over. The landlady was so baik lah apa ani, katanya ia pernah ke brunei dua kali sudah, and pernah dtg to attend ia punya ex-tenants pnya wedding. and katanya pernah one of the girls homesick skali ia bawakan cakes and they had a little tea-party. Tapi masalahnya, it was expensive and a little over the budget. Well, maybe a LOT over the budget.

The second house:

Slightly less mahal, but still quite mahal lah. Smaller rooms, but was hommier, but the stairs were smaller, so takut gugur and the toilet was after the kitchen. But otherwise, an okay house. Asked the previous tenants abt the house, and they said apart from a little creaking upstairs, it's a fab house.

In between the two house viewings, went to Andrea's house and had maggi YUM a good makan after the house hunting stress! Met one of the new housemate jua, and she was lovely. :)

Anyway, searched for some houses before later at night, went to mengaji night. Before that, emailed the lady that the house was a little too expensive and will deffo move into the house if she wants to lower the price. And suddenly the first house landlady called. And wanted an answer in hour after agreeing to reducing the price but was still mahal.

Pikir punya pikir........... we turned down the house. Lalai-lalai, inda plg mengaji menguruskan sigh. The mengaji event ended early, and then while makan-makan, becerita lah how house hunting ini lah, itu lah, sekali becerita how the landlady was so nice apa.

AND THEN.....

Turned out landlady atu penipu. Basically kami kana tipu lah oleh yg first house atu. Will forever ingat nama "PAGAM" or "SHEGEILAGA" pasal ia use both names. Saja pakai G in case ia ani membaca lah HOHO. Inda plg kali. And then katanya ia religious lah apa lah, will always return deposit. Skali kata seniors (like 3 seniors, dif house) pernah under ya skali they all inda suka! :( And she said she never cuts from deposit pasal house always mcm ada sikit2 rusak lah apa, skali turned out ia cut waaaaaa. And ia slalu lambat usai things jua. And ia badmouth kami punya landlord jua, when we didn't even say anything. And then kamis edih lah, mcm kana tipu hidup2. And ia always usethe same story, suka org bruneilah, dtg kawin atu lah, etc.

Turned out everyone knew abt her stories, apart from us!

But alhamdulillah lah, we turned down the house. Ada hikmah. And now looking for more houses. Hopefully will be able to find a good house, with good price lah, amin :)

And then went back, and an hr after that prolly, some girls datang to visit us and becerita2 lah HEHEHHEHE it was fun lah.

And went to my room, open an envelope, an received a rejection for smtng that i can possibly get for free. So now have to payyyy D: Inda apalah. Again, ada hikmah tu, i know, insyaallah. :)





So conclusion of the day/story:

1) A free day turned out to be too eventful day and now i'm super exhausted.

2) Sometimes, walaupun kitani honest, tapi org lain inda honest. SIGH. The world is indeed a dirty place. Tapi we cannot be one of those dirty people, kalau inda makin tia betambah kamah dunia ani. Hopefully ia dpt berkat lah, smoga org atu berubah. And hopefully kalau ia balum berubah, jangath ada org Brunei yg tertipu lagi under ia.

3) Walaupun with the kes penipuan, and the rejection, but there are a lot of good things to look to. Eg my brother here accompanying me skajap in UK, the flowers from someone yg nice, the girls yang always so supportive with advice apa.

and lastly, i believe everything ada hikmah. I truly do.

So...... Sorry if ada yang rasa this blog pontless. I did warn you in the beginning.

For now, tata, assalamualaikum, and byeeee <3 :)





Love,
Piping.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Dreading winter

Salam everyone,

winter's coming... and few weeks ago, the owner of our house here came over to fix the door, in which pintu atu bedrama jua mcm aku, mahu tia dibuka. Padahal few days before he came, the door couldn't be unlocked/locked, and it was raining, and masa ia dtg macam nada tia... Could be because the lubricationg oil yg i sprayed barutah mau or pintu atu banci kami. Nuff said.

Anyway with the winter that keeps gettin worse each year, aku rasa mau pengsan. I'm coughing so much and it's been going on for three weeks now. :( im not getting enough sleep because of it, and it makes me cranky.

And last weekend, i went to my brother's to celebrate his birthday. And then on the way back to Nottingham, i bought a Glamour magazine, and in the magazine, it said if we are sick, rest because if inda, it will take longer to be healthy. But the thing is, if I dont go to lectures and stuff, I will miss a lot of things. And if i miss a lot of things, banyak tia kan dicatch up sekali jadi stress. Kalau stress, jadi damam lagi. Cemanakan tu :( The cycle is just vicious.

I was reading this blog sekali this girl took a picture with her touching her friend's pregnant tummy. HEHEHHE it makes me feel warm. Imagine that's one of us! In few years time now guys hahahhaha siapa dulu ni HAHAHHA :p

Bai.

Suddenly lost the drive to type things down. Keep warm people in the winter season. And for those in the equator region, go to air conditioned room hohoho :)

-Ping.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Oh my gaddddd!!

Its like ntaah berapa lama sdh aku nda buka blog andi and baca and kamu make it alive again!! im so PROUD OF U GURRRSS!! kaka bangga dgn adik2 sekalian LOLS =P

Anyway mcm2 cerita kamu aaah, siuk membaca, dikala saya sungguh sunyi ani jua.. so yeaah~~ its fun, like aku ketawa sorang2.. mcm apa!! hahah AND kamu semua balik UK sdh, the uk-ians ofcz, and since im here I dint really go out dgn fnv brunei, so I kinda running out of time now since me myself going back soon. So gurlssss pliss free kan diri kamu... tpi aku tau kamu busy tho. hmmph~~ *sigh!

Oiiii lawa gmbar raya kamu aaaah.. sygnyee saye takde =( kalau nda lagi AWESOME and LAWA-ERRR tuuu.. haha! Aku liat tu lastym, the raya thingy and aku mau gmbar sana. Bt then mcm aku sorang sja, so aku MALUU~~ klau ramai mau ku.. if ada patner in crime lah katakan. Tpi nada, sedih~~~aku rasa mcm poklen klau gmbar sorang2 hahaahahah NGOK!

By the way gurrrllsss, aku RINDU kamu semua, and wow! our frenship is super long already. And I hope we will still be together closer even more years to come. smpai kita kawin sorang2 and dpt anak cucu cicit. that would be great! Cheers!! =)

<3 Fyqa

Monday, September 19, 2011

As if i have never left.

Less than a week to go, and soon, i am going to leave for UK.

It's going to be my 4th year in UK... and honestly, this leaving gets worse. Every year, always, i dread it. That feeling at the airport when everyone else starts crying and you start breaking down too, knowing it's going to be another year till you see these amazing faces, making inside jokes, creating memories.

Bukan nya nda mahu bersyukur, amatlah bersyukur dianugerahkan scholarship, hanya Allah yang tahu. But every year, nephews and nieces grow older, siblings and cousins grow wiser, and I am not there, to see all of that. All achievements, seen through pictures, and facebook. And in summer, it's so hard to see everyone, catch up and share the stories of one whole year, or if you have not seen the person the previous year, two whole years worth of stories to catch up.

Sometimes the stories are forgotten, and in the end, left with no more stories to tell.

Going back to UK to continue my second year, really....? It's like I never left.

Monday, September 5, 2011

DEFINE BEAUTIFUL





Beautiful is a woman who has a distinctive personality, one who can laugh at anything, including themselves, who is especially kind and caring to others. She is a woman who above all else knows the value of having fun, and not taking life too seriously. She is a woman that you can trust and count on to brighten your day. She is a woman who can inexplicably make you feel really good just by being around her, and yet brings such great sadness when she is gone. She is a woman who I will never really get to know.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Allergy.. please go away and never come back.

Salam :)

4th raya today.... How's your purse going? Semakin berisi with angpau? TEHEEEE :p well for me, we haven't raya much. Lagipun i'm BASAR sudah. both badan and age wise. HAISH. so people hesitate to give meeeee. Beri sad one.

And my allergy is getting worse. SO i was talking to my brother, complaining how the allergy's fine in the morning but gradually getting worse throughout the day. Sekali the doctor said it's photosensitive and stress related, meaning i cant expose myself too much to the sun. Feeling like a vampire, an ugly one perhaps HOHO. and stress related, but the thing is i didn't expose my self to the sun, nor am i stress.

So i concluded that it might be due to the food i ate. Sekali i said to my brother, "What did I eat ah? Let's narrow it down...." And my brother.... "*cricket-cricket* The thing is... You eat everything. Payah jua kan dinarrow down tu"

HAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAH OMG.

well.... it's true. I eat everything, especially time puasa ani. I think im allergic to raya cakes, pasal it contains a lot of eggs. But i always eat eggs. and im fine. and for udang, kerang and lukan, i eat them time puasa and i was super okay. So mcm..... Apatah ni.

Unknown tah banar.

Sometimes I wish I know the answer.

But oh well. Let's just pray it will lessen. Amin! I have high hopes ni! AMIN YA RABB!

Friday, September 2, 2011

Syawal fever.

Firstly, now that ramadan has ended.... Time to welcome a new month :)

Selamat hari raya maaf zahir batin everyone! Minta maaf if ada terkasar bahasa, ter-annoy sana sini.. I know aku always beulah and gauk-gauk and perasan ciyotz (yang membari kamu trauma berabis TEHEE) but nevertheless, I hope you guys will have an awesome and fabulous eid celebration, di samping keluarga tersayang.. :) For those yang go back UK, use the time wisely.. Psl krg we nyasal-nyasal and ter-rindu-rindu and thinking why on earth we didn't use the time wisely. SO EAT MASSIVE AMT OF TAPAK KUDAS (or gajahs LOLs) and ketupat and charging camera supaya gmbr bnyk2 and langgar open houses etc.

Speaking of charging camera, I bought a new one WOOOHOOOO. I am so happy. it's a pink one, so now i am going to resume back to my not-so-amazing photography skilllzzzzzz :p If we meet next time, i will try my best untuk take loadsa pictures! SO MESTI LAWA-LAWA KAYSS :p

Speaking of raya, masa mid month of ramadan, my mother got kad raya. Sekali I was very jealous. I kept thinking, aku mahu jua kad raya. Yang written with love, and long longggggg message. And then on raya itself, you know how few years back, we always receive msgs on the night esok nya raya. Sekali mcm dst always jam apa psl a lot of ppl send msgs walaupun kdg2 it's teh same pantun used every single year LOL but really, mcm it's a competition who dapat the most texts msgs regarding raya!

Tapi this year... mcm nda bnyk msgs. Less than ten i think. Is it because I've spent most of raya outside Brunei and that people have lost my contact number over years wen they change their phone, ataupun the modernisation of having facbook & twitter ataupun ppl just malas to spend their credit... HAHAHAHHAHA it really makes me think yknow.

Sekali. How over the years, the joy of having raya lessens. I guess that's the price we have to pay for growing up.

But for now, enjoy raya as it is. Meet relatives. Eat good Brunei food. And try to have fun. Hopefully there'll be no regrets when Syawal is over, amin. :)



xxx

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Selamat Hari Raya

FnV (25.08.11) - without Fifah, Zatul and Fyqa.

Despite the fact that I looked like a married woman with children, this is the clearest picture I have in my phone (thanks to Khairi for becoming our photographer), and the picture is is nevertheless pretty with all the other pretty ladies. So yeah, since ada tanda selamat hari raya aidilfitri atu jua, baik tah di upload (inda apa, sacrifice kehodohan ku skali skala. haha =p)

Anyways, its been a while since this blog is updated, atu pun thanks to si dang fifah sebab membagi oxygen arah blog ani. Hehe. Just want to say Selamat Hari Raya everyone. Sorry for all the wrongdoings and any hurtful comments or words that I voiced out either purposely or without realising it (I know, macam sama saja aku punya greetings ani dimana-mana, haha)

Alhamdulillah, its the 6th raya we'll be spending together, which equals to our 6th year friendship as FnV (or apa ni, yang before ada fnv and before aku ada ani, ikan bilis kah? Hahaha.) and more years to come, insyallah.

Enjoy your raya, pretty ladies. :D

Saranghae. <3

Monday, August 29, 2011


I love you guys :)




Here's to our friendship in the years to come <3

Language bejurit and all over the place.

‎"Change of seasons, expected as it is, can be welcomed or dreaded." - Maria E.

Salam!

And i guess welcome! (referring to the above quote) :)

Few days ago, I opened my Notts punya uni email. And OHMAILORD. bejutaan email bejuritan, kalau dpt kumpul jadi bukit haish (HEHE OBER DRAMATIC) but bnyk lah, but not that i could not handle TEHEE. Sekali aku mcm pikir2 semngat jua uni ani ah. Balum lagi kami habis summer. Balum lagi kami abis puasa. Alum lagi kami habis raya.

Well bukan plg salah drg. Cos they dnt celebrate Eid..... HOHO.

Skali today, aku tebaca that quote above. And how i realised, second year is really coming. with winter makin awal, and panjang, and more depressing, and tgn and jari ku purple smua SIGH.

Sepaking of jari, i burnt my finger :( pasal aku membuat biskut. skali bcos i focussed too much on the burnt finger, I burnt my biskut jua :( SEDIH KU. tapi akhernya aku hapi balik. Pasal it's still nyaman. walaupun my finger is still hurting :(

Heniways, back to december (eseh mcm lagu taylor swift). eh before that, aku kan ckp psl lagu taylor swift dulu! HAHAH sorry mcm berterabur but i just feel like i shud type anything random. Entah. kalau nda mahu baca, exit ajeeeee, tuu arah top corner of the window KAYS :p aku membuat biskut kan, selalunya i switch on the radio pasal it;s too sunyi! Skali came lagu taylor swift on air, and aku pkir2 wah.. lagu taylor swift ani sebenarnya genre nya sama. and selalu pasal cinta (yang menjadi or inda menjadi). And sebenarnya lagunya ani nda jua lah bnyk lawa. Ada some saja yg lawaaaa mcm Love story, or crazier, or entah ada lah BUT NOT ALL. Not sure what you guys think, but atu lah pendapatan ku.

Okay. ani banar-banar back to december. Masa december. aku mcm sakit berabis selalu. damam-damam. and like lapar pasal i malas cook psl i too sakit to cook sekali ada pernah kana invite untuk makan delivery arah my senior sekali tunggu punya tunggu inda jua muncul delivery atu. Rupaya drg tutup! Cos it was boxing day, or was it christmas... SIGH. manatah kami tahu drg kan celebrate xmas jua psl drg atu org islam yg punya delivery place.

and aku rindu snow jua. i kennot wait to play snow, attack org, aku rasa segala joints ku habis kesian bangkak kali, aku mcm berabisly mcm asgai wah attacking the guys cos it was girls against gurys. and the girls takut. so siapatah kan berani. so aku one of the brave girls ESEHMENNN. skali this new acadmeic year will be playing sama new notts people, hopefully it will be epic smpai pukul 3am mcm last year.

Bah okay panjang. suddenly ilang mood kan blog. kan baca buku.

Oh a good book, by an author graduated from oxford. I wanted smtng heavy, and this one's about war, and scandal, and anaknya yg kana evacuate. Anyone, fnv or random people who stumbled upon this blog, suggestion for any heavy books for me pleasE? HEHEH THANKS IN ADVANCE! :D


BAH BAIIIII MWAHS

Love,
Piping.

Bini-bini atu amazing bah.

Salam peeps.

I stumbled upon this amazing blogggg few days ago. She's not the type whose english is amazing, rather she's quite someone who is very critical on things in life, very bad tempered as well, but what I like about her is that she writes or blogs, sincerely, of things that are coming from her heart, and that she cherishes the simple things in life. And i thought that was something which I adore.

And the fact that she takes loads of pictures, about her life, and adventures, and how she watched the sunset at Cameron Highlands, buat aku jealous banget. Aku rasa aku inda pernah tengok proper sunset, I think. :( Kesian eh. and how every story of were photographed. And how she used to not wear a tudung, sekali slowly, she tried and she did not promise it's going to be permanent, she did warn people esp those yang judgemental and ckp "eh kemarin pakai tudung, ani nda tia pakai" kinda people, and syukur alhamdulillah, it's something that's permanent for her now :)

And how ia ani jenis yang mcm.. gila sikit. Mcm bimbo ada jua. Mcm yknow when people take pictures, org slalunya senyum, and then she's the type yg buat cheeky weird faces. TAPI SIUKS. and she's soooo lawa as well, but i tell you, ia berabisly capable of makin muka paling hodoh di dunia. She even joined contest yang "making the ugliest face" type of contest! Dont know if she won or not, tapi hodoh berabis lah, aku ketawaaaa!

And she's the type yang adventurous (anything healthy please!!), yang naik gunung, yang cuba ikut contest arah magazine smpai she won a free pink Guess watch MCM OMG see? I guess if you never try you never know!

Iatahkan. Aku rasa ia berabisly amazing.

And ia masani kana ambil untuk memperagakan (eseh basar malay word TEHEE) baju muslimah kinda thing. And baju-baju yg ia modelkan lawa berbais. I BERRRYYY BERRY MUCH WANT. tapi i tink dpt di malaysia saja. and sizes nya small. Untuk org badan kecil saja. But I had fun browsing through the pictures. Mcm membagi idea on how to jadi model arah ANTM jua HEHEHE

Anwayyy here's the link. And she's the one in grey skirt! :D http://www.ilovepastelina.com/

Sorry klw mcm inda interesting kali. AHHAH SO WHAT, IM STILL A ROCKSTAR. kata si Pink! LOLs


xxx
Ping <3

Thursday, August 4, 2011

"Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass"

Meredith: [voiceover] Pain, it comes in all forms. The small twinge, a bit of soreness, the random pain, the normal pains that we live with everyday. Then there's the kind of pain you can't ignore. A level of pain so great that it blocks out everything else; makes the rest of your world fade away until all we can think about is how much we hurt. How we manage our pain is up to us. Pain. We anaesthetize, ride it out, embrace it, ignore it... and for some of us, the best way to manage pain is to just push through it.

One word. BANAAAARR PLANGGGG.

Meredith: [voiceover] Pain, you just have to ride it out, hope it goes away on its own, hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions, no easy answers. You just breathe deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed, but sometimes the pain gets you when you least expect it, hits way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain, you just have to fight through, because the truth is you can't outrun it, and life always makes more.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Memories photographed.

Tossing and turning on the bed and suddenly ada drive to blog....... Weird.

I was just browsing through all the pictures that I have since I arrive in the UK. Massive amount of them from my first year and slowly....... the amount decreases. Who is it to blame? Is it the fact that my camera rusak and has this little black dots whenever I take pictures (DON'T KNOW WHERE I GOT THEM, SADLY) or the fact that my friends have this massive DSLR which makes my pretty small cheap camera looks... so kasihan.. or just purely the fact that I've gotten so malas to take pictures with hope someone else will.

And last week, my hard disk decided to make the "clung clung clung" sound. I was..... in major devastation. Googled it and apparently it's one of the worse case scenarios that can happen to a hard disk! :( I don't mind losing all the movies, or songs, well maybe i do mind a bit, but not as much as losing photos.

Lost all my last summer Singapore photos :( and my Paris photos. Summer raya and everythign related to it. I should've made backup. So buta IT fifah. Mi heart is breaking.

Then I complained to my mom, and she said, "Well bulih jua ke Paris semula" HAHAHAH made me smile. My mom, always know how to say the best and sometimes funny things. Bless her ya Allah, amin!

Tapi I guess you can't compare that to the sufferings of the Palestinians, or Norway people who are dying due to the terrorist attack.

So in the end, life goes on, life goes on.

And because of that I learned that:
1) I should develop my pictures. Supaya ada hard copy!
2) I should invest in a camera.

YES I SHOULD. :)

Birds are chirping, I guess it's my cue to sleep! Goodnight/goodmorning everyoneeee. Salam!


xx
Pips :)

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

A great speech. Or nayy?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3rt2GVcUN4&feature=share

Maybe it is easier, to be alone. Quoted from Grey's Anatomy. There's no one you need to lean on. Being on your two feet. Knowing whatever keeps you strong comes from you, no?

The video made me think.

BUT NO FAH. THINK AGAIN.

Jadilah orang yang bersyukur.. Syukur kepada Allah Taala as He granted me with loving parents, annoying yet very supporting siblings, cousins, and friends, as my backbone, to success & happiness. Syukur Ya Rabb. Sometimes we forget.. Sometimes we lose will when things drag us down so so much.

One thing I learn, everyone is suffering. Maybe not the same as me, but everyone is, just differently. :)

Maybe in a day, something went massively wrong.. And it will beat the heck out of you. But have we look at the silver lining of life...? That things are taken away from us to be replaced by Allah with something better. Insyaallah..

Today I got two good news. One is where I am happy when someone is happy because he/she has try & taken a big step after a mistake in his/her life, and I truly truly care for this person and for he/she deserves to get the best in everything, syukur alhamdulillah. :)

Secondly, I am told that I am getting a free guitar! Am I lucky or what! :D Told the person I've been meaning to learn guitar. And that person decided to give me ia punya. Should I name it? TEHEHHEE. If so, what? I am so excited. Despite having stubby fingers, pindik lagi, but I will try to play. Tried before & my fingers hurt so badly, but hopefully dapat WHEEEE.

I hope I don't get punkd or else it won't be funny!

Wait for me dear guitar! :)

And lastly, a bit of lyrics from Beyonce, Schoolin life:

"This is for them 20 somethings
Time really moved fast, you were just sixteen"

Time has moved so fast wow. Next academic year, i'm already in second year. Time move fast. But sometimes you've gotta slow down, maybe stop and stare for a while. Or else you'll miss it.



xxx
Pips. :)

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Angst driven.

In times of need, always, without fail, your phone decides to die, or habis credit, or expired tia. Sekali annoyingly, DST started texting you saying"Top up today to get 45days till your next expiry date" or something along those lines. Sekali I went "jkhfbfnejvj" How appropriate timing. Berabis. Inda tia dpt ke kadai pasal nada kerita. Kasian jua lah sedikit. Membari kan jalan kaki tapi hujan skali weather nyaman skali tetidur.... zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

I don't usually do this ramblings, about things that don't go my way. Pasal it shows it's quite freaky. Skali people judge lagi, always. But this time, I don't mind. I really don't.

I know ani stupid berabis. I am bloody exhausted. Tapi pasal I am waiting for something yang Im not even sure will pop up. Sort of stupid, I KNOW. Well people deserve to feel stupid sometimes. It's natural. IT'S NATURAL BAH. Sekali I hate when a promise atu inda ditepati. Kalau sekiranya inda tebuat, jgntah bejanji. Cam apa saja.

Sekali it's annoying how time cemani jua, it's starting to hurt. I thought I'm over it. Bukan love ni eh. Shallow banar jua wei. Well.. sebenarnya I know i was never over it. Before I sleep, or when I wake up, I keep thinking, thinking and thinking. Sekali to add salt (with pepper and chilli) into the wound yang sepatutnya bangas tapi balum pasal I'm not over it, sekali jadi makin padih by listening to emo songs. So people, what songs do you recommend me today? Add a little something something to my itunes lah.

This post macam full of angst. Sorry. Kalau sangal, beranti baca.

I know in life, things don't always go our way. I know.. Issokay. Cause it always turns for the better. But for now biar tia bitter sedikit. There will be sunshine, with rainbows after today.




x (pasal aku karit this time. Satu saja)
Pips.